‘I’m fine’ is one of the most popular lies ever.
Little — big lies
Humans have basic instincts to survive and reproduce, our actions like sleeping, eating and fornicating — are rooted in those instincts.
I hate being lied to, what’s to like about being deceived? Ugh.
But the truth is, I lie all the time too. I’m willing to bet, so do most of you.
What was the last lie you told? Be honest, I’m just asking you to think of it — no need to share it.
I told mine a few hours ago, my six year old son asked if he was funnier than his older brother — which is nothing but a parent trap that I had no intention of getting caught in — so, I lied.
That’s right, shitty parenting 101: if it’s going to cause a mighty, tantrum filled shit storm, LIE!
Works effectively on that type of micro level, shit storm avoided.
But, what about the bigger stuff? Is it the size of the lie and the possible impact, that determines if it’s OK to lie? I guess most folks have their own moral compass that guides them, but it won’t always align with societies.
We’re all trying to stay afloat in the current sea of ‘alternative facts’, we’re being saturated with new labels that just look like strategies to repackage something as old as humanity — yep, lies.
The truth may become our kryptonite
Remember the film A Few Good Men, in the courtroom scene during the US Navy trial, Tom Cruises character is as a lawyer and shouts out that he wants the truth — and the defendant played by Jack Nicholson yells back:
“You can’t handle the truth!”
I imagine sometime way back when, a few good men and maybe some women — across many cultures, all around the world — decided there was a ‘need to know’ basis for pretty much everything. Then, on they went, populating the world whilst perpetuating this notion to the masses.
Today, we have gaslighters in chief — carrying the torch, ever forwards.
The truth is, sometimes — the lie is more palatable. Have you ever found something out, you immediately wish you could un-know? I have. Now you find yourself carrying this hot potato of truth, neither you or the folks involved want.
Getting to the truth is indeed a noble cause, justice of course — depends on it. The truth still matters. But have we become so accustomed to the comfort of lies, that sometimes we will swat the truth away like a nuisance fly — trying to disturb our peace?
Causing hurt to those around us, is not a good feeling. Sometimes I elect to lie to protect them, other times I will choose to tell the truth to protect myself — and vice versa. Either way, karma takes care of the rest in part by landing us with a guilty conscience, unless you’re a sociopath — then I am not sure what you’re default setting is. Good luck with that.
Isn’t lying another one of human beings shitty strategies to ensure our survival? Humans have shown time and time again, just how ruthless we can be in our quest to survive whatever we may come up against.
The uncomfortable truth is, lying is often an effective strategy — in protecting ourselves and our interests.
I lie to my children sometimes, this is a strategic choice I make to cope with the day to day demands of parenting — because the truth isn’t always the best strategy. Hypocritically, I still teach them not to lie *shrugs shoulders*. I’m sure they’ll be some folks ready to wag a disapproving finger my way, but honestly — #Idgaf.
I’m out here trying to survive, just like you.
The struggle is very real, maybe we really are struggling to handle the truth nowadays — maybe, we always have.
Even though I’m a liar too, I remain ever curious. I will say it again , the truth still matters.
We really could use a revolution in truth telling, so —’viva the revolution!’
Honestly, I wonder what my next lie will be, it will likely be sooner rather than later — I’m hoping it won’t be ‘I’m fine’.