Excerpts of you — pieces of me, exist beyond the boundary of time.
Once upon a time…
I almost died as a baby.
My parents were told by Doctors, that I — their second born child — may not make it out of babyhood. A serious illness left me hospitalised and losing weight rapidly, I guess they prepared for the worst — but hoped for the best.
I can only imagine how they felt, both my existence and theirs already so deeply entwined. There we were, our lives somewhat paused — with our breaths collectively held. Two of us surely aware, that we were face to face with the possibility — of the disruption of the natural order of things. An order, that dictates that a child should outlive their parents.
I wonder how oblivious I was, did I know that something was amiss and my life was in jeopardy?
Forgotten memories of those life changing moments, are filed somewhere within the recess of my subconscious. Moments when three people who although were faced with dying and suffering — were still living.
Suffice to say, the Universe and biology rose up and conspired to ensure the natural order would eventually come to pass.
I am now a living home not only to my life — but to those of my ancestors and my parents. Carrying us all, to every place I go.
Here I am now at forty two, an adult orphan.
Time is a human construct, a clever mathematical system created for our convenience. In between those spaces that we have come to measure in seconds — milliseconds — microseconds — nanoseconds — life is being lived and created.
Even during moments when I may hold my breath, I’ll do well to remember — that I am still thinking, feeling and living the nothingness and the everything.
I choose to believe ‘I am my ancestors wildest dreams’. Perhaps, I am also my parents wildest dreams.
This — feels like some kind of flying.
“So come with me where dreams are born and time is never planned.” — Peter Pan (as written by author J M Barrie)