Merry go round

the dizziness is intoxicating

I feel upside down

maybe I’m drunk again

or dreaming somehow

does the sun spin around the earth

or the earth around the sun

there are stars beneath my feet

there are oceans in the sky

I am naked — shattered — bruised

I am plucking arrows out of my flesh

I am wounds unhealed

I am pained to confess

as the moon rolls away

down a yellow brick road

my blood is boiling

and yet — I am cold

how different might it be — if only I had courage

if only I possessed a useful heart

if only I had answers to these stupid questions

if only I was smart

trying to figure stuff out

wondering what happened to me

does anybody know

did anybody see

if I fall off this ride

will things become clear

will the whispers tell me

what I am doing here

if I land amongst the stars

will I know what to do

perhaps i’ll just fall up

into those oceans of blue