The other day I sneezed and simultaneously — bit my tongue,
I swear I heard the Earth say ‘Ouch!’
as it stood still by my side in empathy.
I tensed every limb and risked bursting every vein,
and I counted down from five to one — then back to five again,
and all at once, thoughts of you ran amok stampeding through my brain
as I spat blood — I curled my tongue and cursed at the scent of your name. Why must Cupid keep keeping on, just mocking me this way?
His poisoned bow shot me down years ago — so recklessly on that fateful day, infecting me with self sabotage dressed up as you
its more wicked — twin flame,
now all of this anguish, I continually regurgitate,
just hoping to give back every single butterfly — you ever sent floating my way
see, I formed a terrible — terrible habit,
making you synonymous with every type of pain
my grief, my disappointments — all those feeling not good enough days,
I pushed it all down like a landslide
trying to crush the sound of your name,
but it was the rebirth of me after you
that got buried alive — all over and over again.
Unforgiving — resentment is the poison I drank to kill your memory,
but every time I drink — every detail of every hurtful scene
comes flooding back to me,
the directors cut — all blood and guts
nothing left on the editors floor,
what the hell’s the point of this de ja vu
I’ve seen it all before.
I’m so fed up with these tears I cry
like an Ocean on the run.
Adulthood is kicking my arse,
what has this silly life become?