Unapologetic Black on Black Love - is What Freedom Looks Like to Me

“I love my Blackness and yours.” — Deray Mckesson

D. Abboh
3 min readMar 22, 2019


All. Black. Lives. Matter.

Don’t let the bullshit fool you, Black love is here, out and proud — against all the odds.

I’m a Black, heterosexual woman, and — I love Black men.

One more time for the folks fidgeting ever so uncomfortably in the back: I’m a Black, heterosexual woman, and I love Black men.

The bullshit, or more succinctly — racism, will have minds twisted into believing that such statements are some kind of affront to the inclusion that many people pay only lip service to on the regular.

To that I say ‘you tried it’ as I *LMFAO*

What these statements actually do willingly, is disrupt the comfort of the apathetic ‘well intentioned’ who pridefully award themselves with pointless badges of dishonour for not partaking in racist marches or hate speech, whilst simultaneously — not challenging it at all when confronted with it. Because, you know, their comfort is at stake. These statements also offer a chance of self interrogation to anti-Black Black people, to take a closer look at the rotten roots that encourage the growth of that type of self hate.

The truth is, Black Love has been suppressed, oppressed, outlawed, called sinful, fetishized, whitewashed, etc for hundreds of years because of this dumbness called racism that persists in subjugating Black people as subhumans incapable or unworthy of love. It’s quite telling how the popular narrative of ‘Black on Black crime’ rolls so easily from many a wagging tongue, but the mention of Black on Black Love — seems to trigger all sorts of startled stuttering, and hasty shuffling of the ‘script’ searching for words to combat it. According to this spectacular, cringe-fest of white supremacy, anything promoting Blackness and Black Love — is seen as an abomination.

Fear of a Black Planet much?…*fades to Black*

I have been called racist for stating my Love for Black men. Hmm, because clearly reverse racism is a thing, except it’s not.

Nah, where is this same energy when Black people or anybody else states their dating type as perhaps blonde haired and blue eyed?

Oh, I get it, because white is the default, anything that deviates from that — is met with plenty of furrowed brows and somewhat predictable accusations of ‘divisiveness’. *yawns*

In 2017, fellow Nigerian Londoner John Boyega, stated in a televised interview in America, that his ‘type’ is Black women.

Well, the ‘white elephant’ of surprise/shock in the room, was quite the sight for brown eyes. Sure, the hosts and the audience, managed to gather their frayed edges soon enough, just not before we clocked it.

This palpable discomfort/shock with unapologetic, affirmations of Blackness and Black Love, is the takeaway that makes you a little bit sick in your mouth.

This ongoing propaganda that Black women and Black men, do not desire to be with each other, is a stupid myth that needs to be dispelled.

The shameful thing really, is that Black on Black Love has needed to be a revolutionary act at all.

But since it is, the revolution will continue to be televised, tweeted, written, painted, sung, shouted, danced, and just breathed — freely.



D. Abboh

Hey there - I'm D. Writer/Storyteller | Creative Non-Fiction | Poetry. I know a little Tai Chi - but my Kung Fu is weak. Email: dabboh76@outlook.com